Pesto in a sodding tube

Hmmm, jars of pesto are expensive, I thought to myself.

Oh look, I added, pesto in tubes is MUCH cheaper, why don't I get one of those.

Pesto in a tube. Theoretically a beautiful idea. If ONLY you could get the sodding stuff out of the tube and not squirt it all over the microwave, empty water bottles, work surface, floor, chopping board....

[note: the intention wasn't to get it all over said above items and neither was alcohol in any way involved]

[note 2: reminds me of a time, several years ago, when I was going through abaking aubergine (egg plant) phase. the phase lasted for 2 aubergines. the first one was fine. the second one (after which the phase ended) was treated the same as the first and i'd left it happily baking away when, all of a sudden, there was an almighty BANG. rushing into the kitchen to investigate i saw what can only be described as aubergine shrapnell. the bang had been the oven door being blown open when the sodding vegetable had exploded into 100's and 100's of little pieces which were all over the inside of the oven, the floor and the work surfaces opposite.]

i'm not sure why the pesto made me think of the aubergine incident. i guess that's just my rather bizarre train of thought.

anyone else got any cooking incidents worth sharing?